looking up...

I am sorry to have worried my family. I reread my blog posts, and I am unsure of how you perceive them. Maybe they are too vague that it makes it seem worse than they are. The last title "losing my life" was not a negative phrase. It was meant to go along with the verse I wrote down and how as Christians we are to lose our life (and things we can't let go of) and follow God. There are so many things that we can hold as idols rather than God himself. These idols can come in surprising forms, even things like wanting to work for some "cause". It makes sense that God is to be first because it redirects our perceptions; in my case it could protect me from becoming so overwhelmed with the things of this world (which seem to be the main theme of my last few posts, apparently Brazil had more of an impact than I thought).

I want to ease your minds; things are looking up for me. I am looking into a new career path/future lifestyle that may fit me better, and it is one that I am very excited about. My parents came to visit me this weekend and have been relieved by my decision. I work best with a goal, so this should help me from being so worried as well. I will write a better update later; as for now I just wanted to leave a lighter note on my blog.

Although for some of you this is all you get to read about me, I want you to know that I do have fun and joy in my life as well. I know that I may have some intense thoughts, and they definitely wear me out sometimes, but my life isn't always like this. I will try to write more of the positive things so I present a clearer picture of what my life is. But I also know that everyone has worries; I am just usually very transparent about what I am going through.